Why I Am Trademarking Pi

Given the fact that Gallo sues the hell out of anyone named Gallo or anybody that uses the term “Rooster” or “Thunderbird” etc. on anything including nail polish, salt & pepper shakers and shoes, and,

Given the fact that Apple is now trademarking the numeral 280,and

Given that lots of other wine industry numb-nuts have trademarked thousands of words that are in common usage (biodynamics being one), and

Given that it is impossible to write or publish anything involving mathematics (including textbooks) without including the relationship of a circle to its diameter,

Therefore:

I am trademarking the word Pi, and the following numerical sequences:

3.14

3.141

3.1415

3.14159

3.141592

3.1415926

And their usage in any equation, context or combination of any other sequence of numbers.

Makes as much sense as Gallo, biodynamics or Apple’s 280. All you need is money, a totalitarian attitude and lots of expensive lawyers to bully those who think the whole intellectual property field has become a farce.

Hmmmm … perhaps I’ll trademark “Caylee Anthony Child Care Services” while I’m at it.

Update: July 13, 2011:
More Stupid Trademark Trolling: Anheuser-Busch Wants U.S. Area Codes